Jeff Can Blog

Ask & You Shall Receive
Jeff Klepper

God asked for this, so I gave him a list
Who wouldn’t oblige in these trying times?

1) Bring the massacre to the people, we wouldn’t want them to miss out

2) Kiss the children’s heads with empty stomachs and bloated bellies

3) Adopt a new set of beliefs altered specifically for you by those least educated

4) Stop reading this list and question your entire life, it is time to feel something besides ambiguity and confusion

5) Listen to music

And finally get to a hospital and turn in your pills for something a little less likely to cause schizophrenic episodes

Art, is a Liquor Store in Tokyo: Family Mart is a Family Place
Jeff Klepper

You said, where for art thou new?
And I forgave the failed attempt to renew

But the flesh and mind never seem to rhyme
And I know you were full of it most of the time

I trust in my own system of deduction
A maladjusted form of destruction

Cling to the old, for the present are never good enough
I just wish I had not taken things so rough

High Caliber Moniker
Jeff Klepper

Respect the moon like you respect your shoes
To list your nearest relatives gets difficult with age

Good thing you did commercials when you were young because you know you’re social
And god knows, it’s good to be a social boy and girl with perfect teeth

But respect the air, its poisoning you, but respect it
Break the code, it not as difficult as it sounds
There is no one to love when you are too rich for Microsoft Excels first mock sheet

Lonesome words are just unkempt sentences ready to be reworked for publishing
So tear out the wires and restart the computer
We have months of lies to sort through, so start with the last email you sent
It is always the best place to reclaim your self esteem

Reboot and scream something unrecognizable
The computer will know just what you mean

Hitler and the Malibu’s
Jeff Klepper

As we said in Nam, “Charlie it is going to be a while”
Be rest assured your local preacher is no longer a pedophile
I checked, Twice, in fact!

As I write this I recover the words I have meant to write months before
Shallow pools, muddled with consequence remind me not to ask for more
I knew it was too good to be true when I heard intelligence drip from your lips
And regrets are nothing short of monolithic period pieces set atop alters wrecked across ships

It is a new age, a cyber one at that, so please remember to keep your virus software up to date

We wouldnt want you to catch a trojan cold, or worse, a full on case of the hard drive wipes

I will leave you with this, a painting of some half wit genius, so develop like the photos of the dying days of your past, just remember not to lighten your load too fast

The Big Bang Theory Is A Terrible Show
Jeff Klepper

Boys it is time to listen up–

Much has changed since Jesus took that sip from that Cup

We have rules, we have games —

We have socio-economic problems, we have shame

But, don’t get upset, don’t bat an eye

Don’t fidget with your cross, you still will die

Don’t expect an explanation, don’t expect a severance package

Just squeeze that stress ball and pray to your local bank of trust

Because the world has not changed, no, you see, we were wrong

And the world is just a function of a Bang that happened to go along

Hollow N’ In-between
Jeff Klepper

Present the tide and I will follow with objections to pride

I lick the salt from my lips each day while nature concocts its next genocide

Falling in love is like falling into a rare gems prescience then forgetting its brilliance–

I sometimes recall when my brain did not contain such fury

But so it goes with young men, with sudden gusts of lively instability

Cure my mind with your drugs, cure my heart with all the letters in the alphabet

And I will try my best not to laugh when you inject my veins with that sour milk

Let us not forget there is more to this than that circular ignorance

Love is just a broken promise to mans own ambivalence

God Said No, And So You Rebelled
Jeff Klepper

The Almighty Has a lot to Say:

Oh, boy you better not be gay
Or have a taste for blood

Because I have retribution in the form of a flood

But I am good with figurative language and you better figure I have your best interests in mind

Not that I have any sense or know the definition of the word kind

Now do not jump to conclusions and accuse me of the newest forms of atrocity
I am holy enough to guide my angels into war and bring them back with scarcity

Let us not judge the holy for the holy are wholly rounded up
And we can snow like wolves till we remember why I put you here

But than again I never meant to instill fear
I just get so upset when you question absolute truth
Without concrete Proof

October
Jeff Klepper

The cold is back
The winds do stir

The method is maddening, madness is her

Devils populate where they do best
Deep inside of each woman’s welcoming breast

The blood is ice
The veins are hard

We have arrived at this semi-sweet post-modern boneyard

Banshee’s dance in the fogs heavy cough
As we inch closer to our looming undercroft

Idle misty moons
Misery’s melted eye
Reminds the soul to breathe
Just before we die

The Tune
Jeff Klepper

All that I love
I lose
So much for that European Cruise.
That obscene expenditure on my pocket book.
O. This is nothing new.

It might of hurt more with some banter,

or some recourse.

I am stuck here pretending–

I am alright with the let down

and reoccurring remorse.

Those bills are my bliss.

And again I am amiss.

Short Musings From Separate Days
Jeff Klepper

We compare objects because we cannot compare our thoughts
We kill one another because we refuse to accept the plots

No longer do we try to justify, the subservient beings we have become, we choose to overlook it and credit it to our sense of loss

It really could not be clearer, that there is no rhyme to make
That will set us apart from one another, and forgive God for his mistake